Recital Saturday!

My recital is now less than a week away! So excited! This is the culmination of my degree in voice. I will be singing a ton of music and there will be a ton of people. I can't wait!

Program:
Romanza de Angela by Joaquin Rodrigo
Er Ist's by Robert Schumann
Schneeglocken by Robert Schumann
Marienwurmchen by Robert Schumann
La Calle de la Paloma by Edward Kilenyi
La Paloma Blanca by Edward Kilenyi
Al Amor by Fernando Obradors
Chiquitita la Novia by Fernando Obradors
Exaucement by Gabriel Faure
La Messagere by Gabriel Faure
Inscription sur le sable by Gabriel Faure
Fascinating Rhythm by George and Ira Gershwin
Los Pinguinos by Zina Goldrich and Marcy Heisler

SO EXCITED!

My struggle with this recital was rooted in what I would wear and not wanting to look fat on stage. When I found my dress at K's Formal at the Hoover Galleria I was so excited. It is floor length and red (very Spanish). It is incredibly slimming (but I didn't know that yet). The problem was what size to order. In store, they only had the dress in white and in a Large. It was tight and made me feel heavy. I wasn't sure I would be able to breathe in it but there was no XL to try on. The question was: L or XL? To wear the L, I needed to lose about 10 pounds. I wasn't sure I could do it and ordered the dress in the XL. It was humiliating to feel that none of the dresses in the store actually fit me. It was the first time in my life that I had to order a "fat girl" size. I cried in the car afterwards. Even though the dress was beautiful, it made me feel ugly. In the end I have had to try not to lose too many inches because of the dress fitting. When I tried it on in the store after my dress came in, it was a little big in the chest. The saleslady told me to eat a little more so that it would even out and wouldn't need alterations. I feel sometimes like I am stuck in a vortex of being both too fat and too thin. Quite frustrating really. I wish I could please myself and everyone else.

Working too hard as a people-pleaser,
Julia

SW: 180
CW: 178
GW: 130